DO GOALS DEFINE MARKS OR MARKS DEFINE GOALS???

We all have this ultimate fear of scoring well in our exams. Those exam fevers just before our finals, the nightmares of failing our exams and all those negative thoughts of giving up as we think we will not be able to achieve what we dream off just because we assume of getting low scores.

But ever wonder how our marks are the ones responsible to end up our dreams? Are they really responsible or are we as parents and the adults make our children believe so. As working adults how many of us ever came across the questions in our promotion interview- How much did you score in your 10th or how much did you score in your 12th? However, as we keep pressurizing our children to score well in exams, keep pushing them to be top scorer and keep comparing them with other children, we somewhere forget to carve them as the person who knows to prepare their own Plan B and Plan C if their Plan A doesn’t work out. As we always enforce our children to score a 90% or a 95% to make it to the best college and best of the streams, However what we forget to tell them is what to do if they don’t score these marks?

We do tell our children that scoring a 95% will take them closer to their dreams, but what if the child for any reason might end up scoring a 65% instead, is it an end to his dream, his goals? When we guide our children by saying they can take up science only if they score above 80%, they will end up taking commerce if they score between 60 to 80% and only low scorers below 60% takes up arts and the most hopeless ones ends up taking a diploma, are we really motivating them to score good? or are we creating another bench marking system like casteism. This bench marking that we create in their minds, is more or less similar to the age old existent caste system, The Brahmins as the most superiors, then the Rajputs, third in the sequence are the Vaishyas and at the end the Shudras.

With the rising competition and the number of students appearing 10th and 12th rising every year in lakhs, it is very important that we carve our children to be the best in whatever they choose. We help them realise their goals and provide them with a pathway to achieve these goals and not form their goals based on the marks they achieve.

A Note from Counselor’s Desk

Dear Parents,

While your children prepare themselves to appear for their boards, a first step towards achieving their goals in life, Let us as parents, also prepare ourselves to support them, motivate them and let them know, that no matter how good or bad they perform, we shall still love them the way we do. Like most of the parents, you might also be worried about your child to outperform, but it’s also important to remember the marks doesn’t only define these children.

As they are getting closer to attempt for their boards, each of us as parents, need to let our child know, that these boards exams does not assess all of what makes each of them special and unique. It would be great if they are top scorers, but just in case even if they score less, please don’t let them feel down. “It’s Okay, It’s Just an exam- you can still do better” is what we need to motivate them for.

It is indeed essential for us parents to sit with them, listen to them and help them release their stress, worries and fears with an assurance that they are and will always be special to you and their worth would remain the same irrespective of the marks or grades they obtain.

Dear Students,

“You Are A Hard Worker – We Appreciate How You Always Try To Go Above & Beyond”

Remember this and keep striving to achieve your dreams to the fullest. The boards are your stepping stone towards your dreams, where you need to give your best, without worrying about how good or bad you will score.

You my children, have put in a whole year preparing yourself for the boards. Many of you have had sleepless nights, most of you juggled between school, tuitions and assignment deadlines, a lot of you tried to distance from social media, friends, relatives and almost all of you gave up on your play time just to do well in your boards. And the hard work has helped you be the person you are, Talented, Special and Unique in your  own way.

We are never defined by our failures or the marks we score- they only empower us. So no matter if you score a 95% or a 55% for us you all would be achievers with all your natural talents. Do not worry about the judgements, just Stay Focussed in your efforts and start loving each day, because these are the moments which you would cherish for lifetime. Remember, this is just a beginning of your life and there is a lot more to come, which you shall need to face with same hard work and best of your efforts.

Lastly a piece of advice as your School Counsellor, Remember marks should not define your dreams, your dreams should define your marks and streams you need to take after 10^th.  I see the future artist, an entrepreneur, astronaut, engineers, sportsmen, politicians and a lot more in you, but before all this, I see a wonderful Human Being, a dedicated hard worker, a learning enthusiast, who is empathetic, kind, trustworthy and thoughtful and that every day you try to be your very best.

We couldn’t be more proud of You then we already are for the person you have shaped yourself to be!

BEST OF LUCK!!!!!